i dunno what is wrong with me. suddenly i've lost the drive and motivation. it's like, i'm feeling really lousy abt myself. previously when i was changed to play center, i was bad; uncomfortable coz i've always been a defender, and just wasn't familiar playing a position that is more of attacking than defending. now, i'm finally back to my comfort zone, but why do i seem to be getting from bad to worse? why don't i have the drive anymore like before?
the last time i felt like this, followed by influence from someone, i made the switch to train as keeper, which ended up being a shortlived attempt, since i missed outfield so much that i couldn't focus during keeper training. went back to outfield with motivation to work harder than before. right now, i have no idea what is going on with me...and i have to confessed, a part of me is itching to try out for keeper once more.
someone asked me,
what am i playing floorball for? that, i just dunno anymore. all these conflicting thoughts are making me...freak, i'm confused, what am i to do now?
embraced the mystery
// 10:08 pm
